#Credit: /u/Muronelkaz

I have the best elephants, nobody cares about elephants more than I do, this elephant here has 2 pristine, Ivory tusks, worth, I don’t know, millions?, of dollars. The best tusks. that Zebra you have there, it’s colored black and white, just like ISIS’s flag, it’s practically a terrorist mascot, I can help you out by taking it, and giving you the best possible deal here. I have the best deals, you won’t believe this deal you can make with me right here, right now.